Comparison

Comparing your own hustle to others' is a dangerous game.

"Comparison is the thief of joy.”

It’s a familiar saying, but until recently, I hadn’t really reflected on how it plays out in my life.

As I’ve navigated my ADHD journey, I’ve come to better understand how I perceive the world around me.

I have a heightened sensitivity to the people in my life—their actions, moods, and successes.

Unfortunately, this also means I tend to measure my own achievements against theirs.

And it’s not just the "big" successes that get to me.

It’s the small moments too, broadcast through an endless stream of social media updates showcasing their hustle.

I often find myself wondering:

“Am I working hard enough?”

“Am I pushing myself enough?”

But is that even the right question? Maybe the real question is: How do I define my own success?

Because the truth is, I’ve come to realize that my relationship with work and productivity is different from others’.

For me, having ADHD means sometimes feeling out of sync with my peers.

And that often results in a very different work pace.

ADHD author and podcaster Alex Partridge described this as the “boom and bust cycle” of ADHD productivity.

In my pursuit of meeting others' expectations—whether real or perceived—I often lose sight of my own path.

I try to mold myself into what I think others want me to be.

It’s a tendency that becomes even stronger on platforms like LinkedIn.

On LinkedIn, success is a constant stream.

New jobs, promotions, speaking gigs.

Everyone’s hustle is on full display, and it’s easy to feel left behind when I measure my journey against theirs.

I find myself comparing not just their success, but their work styles too.

The late-night grind, the emails that come in at 2 a.m., making me question if I’m working hard enough.

But maybe that’s a sign I’m better at setting boundaries between work and life?

The truth is, my version of success might not look like theirs.

And that’s okay.

I’ve learned that the journey toward self-acceptance takes time.

Some strategies that I’ve found helpful are:

👉 Define Your Own SuccessTake time to reflect on what success looks like for you. What are your values? What do you want to achieve on your own terms, not someone else’s?

👉 Set Boundaries Around Social MediaLimit your exposure to platforms like LinkedIn or Instagram, especially if you find yourself slipping into comparison spirals. Set times to check them, and avoid scrolling when you're feeling vulnerable.

👉 Focus on Progress, Not PerfectionIt’s easy to get caught up in trying to be perfect or match others' milestones. Instead, focus on tracking your progress and celebrating how far you’ve come. Small, consistent steps are the key to growth. And don’t keep moving the goalposts until you’ve really taken the time to recognize your achievements!

👉 Develop Healthy Boundaries with WorkIf you catch yourself comparing your work habits to others, remember that your pace is your own. Setting clear work-life boundaries lets you control your energy and avoid burnout.

👉 Track Your Own GrowthCompare yourself only to where you were yesterday, not to where others are today. Celebrate the progress you've made toward your personal goals, and remember that every day is an opportunity to build on your past self.

Do I still forget to follow my own advice? Of course!

I’m still battling the temptation to compare myself to others, but now I know that I need to look inward to measure my success.

Comparison is only valuable when you’re comparing your current self to your past self—not to someone else’s highlight reel.

And that’s where the real growth happens.

By embracing my own strengths and pace, I’ve found a way to celebrate what makes me different.

There’s so much joy in that.

I’ve come to understand that my ADHD is part of what makes me unique, and that’s a strength, not a flaw.

I want to help others see that too—because no one else can walk your path like you can.

The only competition worth having is with the person you were yesterday.

And in that, I find my joy.